*this is NOT how I really answer them!
Q: Can you be at my house in 5 minutes?
A: Sure! My ad says 2 hours notice, but for you, I'll just hop on my magic carpet!
Q: Can you wear 4 inch white patent leather heels, a black silk pencil skirt, a fitted red button up blouse, etc, etc...
A: Ummm, I provide bodyrub, not a fashion show.
Q: What's the difference between a 1 hour session and a 2 hour session?
A: 60 minutes
Q: What's your REAL name? You can tell me.
A: If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
Q: WOW! If you make that much an hour, you must make over $500,000 a year!
A: Yes, with the help of my magic carpet, I work 8 hours a day 5 days a week. You sure are smart for a lawyer!
Q: Do your parents know what you do?
A: Of course. They have a topless photo of me on their fire mantle.
Q: So, now that we're friends, do you wanna just hang out and have sex with me casually?
A: Yeah, let's get that burdensome "money part" out of the way.
Q: Why doesn't my wife act as sweet and sexy as you?
A: Try paying her.
Q: You must see a lot of smelly, fat, annoying guys. Right?
A: Yes, they're all horrible except for you my darling prince.
Q: I don't believe it's natural for men to be with one woman. Don't you agree?
A: Is that why you got married Mr Science?
